Going private!

Its amazing how people change...
Times they are a-changin! I've become a stay at home mom who thinks about doing various things outside the house for a paycheck (bringing the little man with of course!). My mom has become even more so my rock for being able to keep my sanity when I just wanna kill someone. My dad has done a TOTAL 180 and often wants to see his grandson. When he's holding Anthony, my heart melts and its like all those years of wanting to be as far away from each other as possible never happened. He coos and talks to Anthony with nothing but love! Its amazing! My Grandma hasn't changed too much I guess. She's excited about having her first real, full blooded Great Grandson (and grandchild for that matter). She came down and didn't lecture me MUCH. I was told that I needed to do certain things differently and needed to stop doing this and start that. Thanks, but no thanks. The kid is doing just fine the way we are raising him. My Grammy and Poppy (my mom's parents) are changing big time. Grammy has a pretty severe medical issue that makes it pretty much impossible to be the Grammy I knew and loved when I was growing up. She depends a LOT on Poppy and Poppy just isn't having it. He doesn't do anything logical anymore. He ended up needing some emergency surgery a month or so before I had Anthony and has totally ignored Drs orders. Lovely I know. Well, I guess its like a whole different person who resents everything that is on his plate now. Lovely. Should be the best years of their lives and they are seemingly at war.
Then there are other people. A year ago I left a chat board filled with some really great women. I left for reasons I really am not going to go into, but lets just say I must have stomped on a few toes on the way out. There are many ladies from that particular board who said they would continue to talk to me even though I wasn't on the board anymore. In truth, all but maybe 4 totally stopped talking to me. It wasn't until after I was about 4-6 months pregnant when I was suddenly ok to talk to. I've still blog stalked as many of them as possible since I do care about them. For the most part, most all of the ladies who said they would keep in contact have. But now, those numbers are starting to fall also. I've done all I'm going to do to reach out to these ladies, and pray that this doesn't mean that all is now lost on that friendship, but if it is, I can honestly say I tried and I did care and make it known that I care. I've since been blocked from most of the blogs even though I asked for invites. LOVELY. Maybe I should go private too. Not like anyone seems to take the time to read about whats going on with me...
I never really did like being friends with the girls. Always thought they were too catty and back stabbed a lot. This was something I had to learn, not something I assumed. I always liked playing with the guys during recess, hanging out with the guys after school, and even became so much "one of the guys" that any guy I asked on a date or showed interest in didn't notice. I was often asked to investigate if someone was single or not, if they liked someone, the whole nine. I've tried my hardest to change my ways and become more friendly with other women since I'm in a situation that men really don't get all too much. I started this in High school and tried to keep it going into college (all 9 months! LOL) and into the rest of my life. I've been totally betrayed by more than a few girls since I started this whole idea. I've also rekindled a few REALLY GENUINE friendships (one that surprised the hell out of me!) and have walked away from the total disasters.
What's my point? I'm tired of putting my heart out there, caring about someone, and coming back around to find that the person I gave my trust and love into and prayed long and hard for has stomped on everything I put out there for them. I'm tired of being told that "I'll keep in touch, I promise, nothing will come between our friendship" and then come to find out that they delete any messages from me, ignore or block me, and basically make it seem like they have never even met me. One good example? I recently sent out some packages to some people. I put things in there that I felt they would like and would use. I've sent them texts asking if the package had gotten to them, and have gotten NO RESPONSE. Now, if someone sent ME a package, I try to let that person know ASAP that I got it so they don't think its still out there floating in space. I also like to send a photo (by phone if possible) of the contents being used or that I got it and its still in one piece. I only wish for the same courtesy, but I also know that not everyone is like me in that sense.
I know people change. I accept that. I just wish that people would keep their word and keep the lines of communication open. If you don't like me, TELL ME. If you want me to leave you alone, TELL ME. If I've offended you, TELL ME. If you don't want to talk to me anymore, that's fine, just TELL ME and I will respect your wishes. Kinda hard to respect someone's wishes when they clam up. Its just so amazing how people beg and plead for this and that and once they get it, they really don't show much appreciation for the support they got and the prayers that were said.
Maybe I need to go private to see if anyone even reads this or even cares. I'm already gonna make Anthony's blog private. You want an invite, you know how to get a hold of me. I'm done reaching out.